One Fish, Two Fish, DEAD Fish, Blue Fish

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-24T00:07:00

2009-12-24T05:07:41Z

13:20 Am I just imagining things, or was there really a plot point that involved Hermione trying to take back the term "mudblood"? #
13:21 And if it did happen, it probably didn't happen the way I'm now imagining it. #
13:24 Was someone else talking about this? Is this a joke that somebody made that I now think is real? #
13:24 I really don't want to re-read any of the last three books to find out. #
18:25 Holy crap! @nedroid is going to be at this year's Heroes Con. #
18:27 nedroidcomics.livejournal.com/262246.html for those of you wondering. #
18:27 The delivery of the unpunctuated GORILLA seriously gets me every time. #
18:39 @nedroid Glad to see you're making it in the world. And by making it, I mean going to convention near where I used to live. #
18:39 @nedroid I've been rooting for you since the days of the Jay Pinkerton message board. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-23T00:04:00

2009-12-23T05:04:47Z

00:10 @KingOblivionPhD @theisb I guess if he and a few others made a kind of human pyramid. #
00:24 Is there anything funnier than using the word "ain't" in place of "don't". #
00:25 Such as in the case of, "Baby, you know I ain't know how to use a phone." #
01:16 I'm going back through @nedroid's archives and I'm reminded why everyone should follow @nedroid. #
01:16 You should also go to his website www.nedroid.com or nedroidcomics.livejournal.com #
01:17 He's also the colorist for Dr. McNinja, if that means anything to any of you. #
01:29 @theisb @talestoenrage To be fair, this time I honestly didn't think anyone could actually defend Dunham. #
01:31 @theisb Also also, so far no one's defended Dunham, there's just a guy who ain't know the difference between racist and racial humor. #
01:44 @talestoenrage How goes the slow, steady march towards madness? #
01:51 @talestoenrage Well, if it makes you feel any better, I found out there's a shounen sports anime about American Football. #
01:53 @talestoenrage No, that's the one. I'm still really confused about Japanese people playing American Football. #
01:56 @talestoenrage Here's hoping there'll be one about curling. And it'll be about a kid who's a real natural with those dumb little brooms. #
02:02 @talestoenrage And in the final showdown against Team Canada, he has to develop Phoenix Brush Stroke Zero. #
02:04 @talestoenrage I feel that we could go more places with this if either of us knew a damn thing about curling. #
02:10 @talestoenrage My favorite part of curling is the Pegasus dueling. #
02:15 Sad but true: The losing Pegasus is shot and made into burgers. #liesaboutcurling #
02:18 In curling, the bristles of the brooms are actually made of metal. Dio metal. #liesaboutcurling #
02:19 The expression "23 Skidoo" comes from curling. It refers to Canadian ace Lars Twenty-Three, who would frequently skidoo. #liesaboutcurling #
02:22 The French actually have no word for "curling". But they have at least three ways of saying "goodbye". #liesaboutcurling #
02:24 The proper pronunciation is "curling, eh?" 'Eh?' is something that Canadians say. #liesaboutcurling #truthaboutCanadians #
02:25 Oddly enough, women's curling teams tend to be disproportionately attractive. #forseriousthisisactuallytrueaboutcurling #
02:28 To become an Olympic sport, curling had to defeat biathalon in ritual combat. #liesaboutcurling #
02:29 While not technically illegal, heaving the rock at your oppoents heads is considered very unsporting. #liesaboutcurling #
02:34 Please refer to the broom-wielders by the preferred term, "spastics". #liesaboutcurling #seriouslythattermisoutdated #
02:35 Curling practices were one of the chief inspirations for Thanksgiving. #liesaboutcurling #
02:38 The traditional curling introduction involves at least 2 hours of martial arts posedowns. #liesaboutcurling #
02:39 Well, it is late and I've attracted at least 3 new curling-centric spammers. I'd say my work here is done. #
02:40 And, in a heartening moment, my 1000th tweet wasn't random complaining, it was a lie about curling. #
18:04 www.wired.com/wiredscience/2009/12/star-trek-keeps-women-computer-science/ #
18:05 The thrust is this: Wired does studies about nerd culture and its effects on gender with regards to computer science programs. #
18:05 The comments, unsurprisingly, are a bunch of whiny nerds complaining about women ruining stuff. #
18:08 Listen, I am a nerd. I have been for many years. I come from a family of nerds. #
18:09 It's why I hate the idea that many nerds hold of some kind of nerd superiority (due to intelligence) or nerd persecution. #
18:13 Oh man, one of these commenters has just won the Internet for ever and always. #
18:15 Ladies and gentlemen, I present Reow, Wired Reader and all around awesome dude. #
18:16 "If women don’t have what it takes to be computer scientists, they should stick to psychology, embroidery, or other ‘meaningful’ vocations." #
21:20 @theisb Haters: A Retrospective #
21:22 @theisb Or yell at Smithy until he draws you a picture of Batman, Rom, OMAC, Devil Dinosaur, Dr. Doom and the Punisher riding/hitting bears. #
21:22 @theisb Yeah, having read some of those comments, looks like I'll have to help myself to some crow. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-22T00:05:00

2009-12-22T05:05:21Z

03:07 Today's holiday movie: The Fearless Vampire Killers. #
12:38 I bet John McClane's Christmas memories just involve him murdering a metric tonne of dudes. #
12:41 I bet twinkling lights just make him flash back to getting shot and and running on glass. #
13:50 Oh, I have a few words about last night's holiday movie, Roman Polanski's The Fearless Vampire Killers. #
13:50 If a movie is called The Fearless Vampire Killers, you would expect, at some point, that a vampire would be killed. You would be wrong. #
13:51 Now I know how @theisb feels re: Anita Blake. #
13:54 It did have a castle and snow, so it did feel at least somewhat Christmas-y. #
13:57 But most of that cheer was tainted by the fact that I kept seeing the actors and thinking "murdered by the Manson family" and "raped a kid." #
13:57 That would be Sharon Tate and Roman Polanski himself, respectively. #
18:18 So, my next holiday offering is the Korean Vampire movie "Thirst." #
18:19 It's weird, but good. It's really more of a meditation on sin and guilt than anything else. #
18:20 I'd give it an 8 or a 9 out of 10. #
18:21 Coincidentally, that's also the number of times in the movie I nearly threw the hell up. #
18:21 Seriously, Park Chan-wook, was it really necessary to have a close-up of a fish-hook going through someone's ear? Then ripping? #
18:23 It also qualifies for the 2009 "Least Erotic Sex Scene Ever" #
18:24 I mean, unless you're really into vampire-on-woman-with-the-ghost-of-her-drowned-husband-in-between-them. Then it's probably super-hot. #
18:26 In conclusion, Park Chan-wook makes very good movies, but I'd probably have to punch him in the balls if I ever met him. On principle. #
21:18 I'm honestly getting annoyed about video game makers touting their "tough, moral choices." #
21:19 We get it, guys. You have 2 choices. You can be a good guy or a bad guy. There are generally a few superficial differences. #
21:22 Especially when the difference between good and evil is, "Did you pointlessly murder, like, 500 dudes? Y/N?" #
21:23 I'm coming up on my 1000th tweet, and I just know that it's going to be me complaining about something pointless. #
23:47 @theisb At least with the Jeff Dunham article we've hopefully found one reprehensible thing that your commenters won't defend. #
23:53 @theisb Who knows? Maybe they'll surprise yoooooooo....fuck I can't even finish saying that. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-21T00:05:00

2009-12-21T05:05:00Z

02:22 I've tried getting into teaching to no avail. Looks like I'll have to fall back on my Shogun Assassin experience. #
15:10 @EugePYDK Where do you hail from originally? Don't tell me you also represent the Dirty Souf. #
15:17 @EugePYDK Well, as a North Carolinian, it's my role as a Barbeque zealot to inform you that your Barbeque is an abomination unto the lord. #
15:20 @EugePYDK You have to understand, we go through years of indoctrination about that. It's an reflex. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-20T00:04:00

2009-12-20T05:04:44Z

03:16 @DrPuppykicker It's because you mentioned Bowie. #
03:21 So, I'd never seen any of Fox Reality before, but their logo is actually the Mouth of Madness. #
03:22 It makes a certain amount of sense. I mean, when you gaze into Fox Reality, know that it gazes also into you. #
12:31 I have to say, Avatar still confounds me. #
12:32 I mean, I can already tell you the entire damn plot of the movie. And not in the sense of "the good guys win". I mean the entire plot. #
12:33 To be fair, maybe James Cameron will throw everyone for a loop as the movie ends with a series of climactic battle raps. #
12:35 Or maybe it turns out that humans teach the soothing power of heavy metal to the blue cat people who are someone's exact fetish. #
12:36 Also, I have to say that from the previews, I ain't all that impressed by the visuals, especially if that's all it has. #
12:37 What I've seen thus far makes it look like the human actors are also CG. 'Cause I really wanted some Sigourney Weaver Uncanny Valley. #
12:38 I'm also reminded that I do have family members on twitter who read this sometimes. How proud they must be of me. #
12:38 Yessir, that Master's has totally qualified me to complain about things on the internet. #
13:35 I realize I'm not unique in this, but I'm snowed in. I have declared this day to be a movie day. What should I watch? #
13:36 I have the old Hammer, The Curse of Frankenstein. #
13:36 I also have a lot of martial arts movies. #
13:39 I've already done a viewing of eXistenZ and Taste the Blood of Dracula this month. #
19:59 @DrPuppykicker Still need something to mock? www.apple.com/trailers/mgm/hottubtimemachine/hottub_large.html #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-19T00:05:00

2009-12-19T05:05:23Z

00:44 Did we ever establish how Jimmy Fallon got The Roots as his house band? #
00:44 Did Spider-Man put in a good word for him with Mephisto? #
00:47 @theisb Did you at least get a kindly aunt saved out of that breakup? #
00:55 But seriously, what kind of dirt does Fallon have on ?uestlove? #
00:55 I have learned that it looks weird to have ?uestlove's name be the last sentence in a question. #
02:10 Okay, so @KingOblivionPhD is sick of this, but I'm posting about it anyway. #
02:11 Back when he was in college, there was a guy who lived on his hall who was really pathetic. #
02:11 Naturally, my roommate and I (at a different college) spent our time following this guy's website. #
02:12 I'm not proud of this. But I still take glee from him. #
02:12 We despaired briefly when his website went down, but then we remembered archive.org. #
02:13 So, in summation, if you're ever feeling bad about yourself, just read this, and feel better. tinyurl.com/ydrz38c #
02:14 But here's a taste: "I thought that I could get this girl because she wasn't really that attractive and she would be an easy catch." #
02:31 I would once again like to point out that @KingOblivionPhD does not condone this behavior at all. #
02:33 @DrPuppykicker It isn't a video, and it's a couple months old. But you could take this on: tinyurl.com/yk342l5 #
03:40 I have to say, my main problem with Avatar is knowing that I am looking at someone's exact fetish. #
14:31 New new favorite Onion line: New study links heart disease to eating like a big fat disgusting pig that no one could love. #
15:09 The true reason that I'm not going to see avatar: Out of all of the cliches that exist, the Noble Savage is the one I hate the most. #
19:33 I hope everyone likes shutter shades, because that's the only gift I'm giving. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-18T00:04:00

2009-12-18T05:04:47Z

02:40 This will only be of interest if you like both Iron Man and Mad Men: John Slattery will apparently be playing Tony Stark's dad. #
02:51 So, through long and embarrassing series of links, I ended up reading summaries of various shitty movies. #
02:52 When reading about The Core, I stumbled upon the greatest narrative prowess that language can offer. I hope you're all sitting down. #
02:52 "One of the debris hit Iverson in the head. He died." #
03:31 Christ, I'm ready for the nerd obession with zombies to go the way of the dodo. #
03:32 And the thing is, I like zombie movies. Or rather, I like George Romero movies and 28 Days Later. #
03:33 I also fully realize that this is an extreme case of zombie hipsterism and nerd rage. #
03:34 Like people talking about zombies wanting to eat brains. Brains weren't until Return of the Living Dead. #
03:34 Okay, if this doesn't lose me any followers, I don't know what will. #
13:55 I gotta say, the thing I miss most about North Carolina is the sever lack of raising up, taking my shirt off, and twisting it round my head. #
13:55 That was my bimonthly Petey Pablo reference. Keeping the streak alive. #
14:22 Why Marvel should hire me: I have a whole story about Ol' Dirty Bastard not really being dead, because it was actually his LMD that died. #
14:23 But then: It turns out that maybe ODB was the LMD the whole time. And yes, that sound you hear is your mind exploding. #
14:27 If that doesn't work, I also have a pitch about Jimmy Stewart as a vampire. #
20:09 @DrPuppykicker Would you be willing to go after any of the myriad videos surrounding Avatar? #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-17T00:06:00

2009-12-17T05:06:05Z

03:16 Is there a better shorthand for "given up on life" than Hot Pockets? #
03:25 Well, I guess maybe owning beanbag furniture after you're 30. #
15:22 So, there's an entire thing on TVTropes that's just people complaining about Hollywood swordfighting. #
15:22 NEWSFLASH! Real swordfights are boring. #
15:23 Now they're arguing about lightsabersohmydearJesusareyoukiddingme? #
17:37 When planning the party, need not invite Andrew WK. He is already coming. #partyguru #
17:45 Bull Moose Party has not been popular since 1918. #partyguru #
18:11 Remember, do not prevent leaving people from your party. Even if they refer you as "Mr. Han Man." #partyguru #
18:15 As a note to anyone following me: I will clumsily shoehorn secret island martial arts tournaments into any joke that I possibly can. #
18:25 Seriously GRE people. I paid you money to take your damned test. Can't you just give me my score? #
18:26 Yeah, sorry I didn't meticulously save that web registration code that you gave me four and a half damn years ago. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-16T00:06:00

2009-12-16T05:06:46Z

03:52 "Merry Happy" is my new favorite thing. #
17:26 What's with all the good press about Avatar? I mean, isn't it basically Dances With Wolves with blue people as the noble savages? #
18:27 @talestoenrage Well, he isn't beating ME with one. To be fair, I'd sell out in a heartbeat. #
18:28 ATTENTION: AVATAR IS THE CROWNING ACHIEVEMENT OF HUMAN CIVILIZATION. #givememoneyJamesCameron #
18:29 FOR SERIOUS: SCREW SHAKESPEARE. SCREW CHARTES CATHEDRAL. SCREW MOZART. SCREW CITIZEN KANE. AVATAR ALL THE WAY #givememoneyJamesCameron #
18:35 I'm not joking, James Cameron. I will shill for dollars. Just think about it. I have 47 followers. That is nearly FIVE tens. #
18:35 Only half of them are spam bots. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-15T00:05:00

2009-12-15T05:05:25Z

14:15 I'm reminded of the time when my MC name was going to be Shock-Ra-Tease. It would have been epic. #
14:17 I wouldn't actually rap, I'd just spout stream-of-consciousness, sub-stoner philosophy 101 garbage about how perception is reality. #
14:17 The music videos would, of course, still have lots of women and cars and stuff. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-14T00:05:00

2009-12-14T05:05:07Z

18:44 @EugePYDK Secret island martial arts tournaments #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-13T00:05:00

2009-12-13T05:05:22Z

18:19 @KingOblivionPhD I've seen it. It's not worth it. Trust me. #
18:20 Wooo! Lost my first follower ever! #
18:20 Now I need an exit poll. #
18:21 Was it a). Because I'm boring, b). Because of the history stuff, c). Because I'm dumb, d). Because I'm smelly, or e). Because I'm fat? #
18:22 Also, please mark all that apply. #
18:24 Assess the following statement: You find me funny. a). Strongly Disagree b). Disagree c). Neutral d). Agree e). Strongly Agree #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-12T00:05:00

2009-12-12T05:05:57Z

02:32 Question: Is there a better make-out song than Gordon LIghtfoot's "The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald"? #
02:56 @DrPuppykicker Looks like Hans had to die....hard. #groan #
13:34 How come nobody's done a Harry Potter/The Wire crossover? #
13:39 @DrPuppykicker Omar would use the HELL out of the Marauders' Map. #
13:42 So here's the basic question. Does Diagon Alley just become a de facto legalized drug zone? #
13:45 @DrPuppykicker It's part of the annual exchange between the Baltimore Police and Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. #
13:46 Also, if we follow this logic, then each new Harry Potter book would deal with a different aspect of witch life. #
13:48 @DrPuppykicker There'd be a lot about the reporters at the Daily Prophet later on. #
13:55 Diagon Alley meets Murderland Alley. #
13:57 Plus, I'm pretty sure McNulty would have handled the tracking of the horcruxes a little differently than Harry and Hermione did. #
14:02 What this basically comes down to, is I enjoy mashing Harry Potter up with anything. #
14:02 See also: #wutangwizards #
14:18 Jeez, tvtropes. I recognize what you're doing, but do you have to explain every single detail about every work of fiction ever? #
14:25 Is it bad that when I get a few new followers (emphasis on FEW), my immediate thoughts jump to how to alienate them? #
14:26 Thus I'll talk about my favorite historian, Robert Darnton. See the awesome thing about Darnton is that he's also trained as a journalist. #
14:26 So his writing is clear and concise, but without compromising any of the points he's trying to make. #
14:28 He wrote a piece that I'd recommend to anyone, talking about the role of libraries in the internet age. #
14:31 Darnton's success, though, partially comes from adapting to new technology and embracing it. #
14:31 www.nybooks.com/articles/21514 #
14:33 One of his points early on is a defense of blogs as somehow an unstable information source. #
14:34 He points out that really, information has never been stable, we only think it has been. #
14:34 ....okay, I've lost no followers. I give up on talking history for now. #
14:35 Be warned, I just might go off on a tangent about the influence of the Annales school and Braudel. #
14:50 @DrPuppykicker Tell you what, next time we'll do Harry Potter/Sondheim Musicals. #
15:06 @nickpopio Shame on a Death Eata' #
15:06 @nickpopio Da Mystery of Wizardchessboxin' #
16:25 Out of curiosity, who was it who told Mike Meyers that he was good at accents? #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-11T00:06:00

2009-12-11T05:06:59Z

13:46 @theisb Chicken? #
16:10 Thug American Life #nprrap #
16:13 Carl KSL-1 #nprrap #
18:54 "Forget it, Jake. It's The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension." #groan #IthinkImdoingitwrong #
19:06 Y'know, I didn't think the 4th Indiana Jones was the worst thing in the world. #unpopularopinions #
19:07 I didn't think it was good, mind you. But I don't think it's as bad as everyone else does. #
19:07 Also, to this day I like Ang Lee's Hulk. #unpopularopinions #
19:08 I actually prefer Liquid Swords to Enter the Wu Tang. #unpopularopinions #
19:12 I sometimes find @KingOblivionPhD funny. #unpopularopinions #
19:18 Outside of a few specific examples, I'm really not that big a fan of Batman. #unpopularopinions #
19:18 For the record, those examples are Dark Knight Returns, the Nolan movies, and Batman: The Animated Series. #
19:20 The original Tim Burton Batman movie does not hold up at all. Not even a little bit. #unpopularopinions #
19:21 As @talestoenrage can attest, while I enjoy Tony Jaa, I find him overall lacking as a complete martial arts action star. #unpopularopinions #
19:22 While I can enjoy aspects of Quentin Tarantino's movies, I think he has some severe shortcomings, and is overrated. #unpopularopinions #
19:23 In fact, I'll just go ahead and say that Pulp Fiction is the arguably the most overrated movie of the past 20 years. #unpopularopinions #
19:24 While Heath Ledger did a good job in The Dark Knight, I don't think anyone should get posthumous awards. #unpopularopinions #
20:37 I have to ask. If you a). Don't know me in real life or b). Don't know me through @KingOblivionPhD, why the hell are you following me? #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-10T00:06:00

2009-12-10T05:06:31Z

02:01 Man, I miss Stuff Geeks Love. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-09T00:09:00

2009-12-09T05:09:55Z

00:36 So, the first part of the Masters of Horror title screen is really pretty awesome. #
00:37 Then it devolves into the a contest of how many horror cliches they can cram into 30 seconds. #
00:38 (And yes, I'm continuing to spend the Christmas season watching horror). #
01:46 So, final review of Cigarette Burns. It was pretty damned good. #
01:47 There was a bit too much gratuitous gore at the end, but still pretty engaging. Not really scary, though. #
01:47 Mostly, the movie makes me angry. Seriously, how can John Carpenter do good things like this, but still made the movie Vampires. #
01:48 Vampires, by the way, is still seriously one of the worst movies I've ever seen in my life. #
01:56 This also makes the Masters of Horror Anthology 1-1. Cigarette Burns was good. The Damned Thing was not. #
16:02 @Bella_Caccini Oh, I'd totally be Matt. Then I could just punch myself in my stupid face all day long. #
16:19 @Bella_Caccini If fictional characters, then definitely Aunt May. Or Aunt Bea. Definitely a single-syllable aunt of some sort. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-08T00:06:00

2009-12-08T05:06:22Z

17:52 Okay, people who are writers: Vampire Jimmy Stewart. Make it happen. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-07T00:06:00

2009-12-07T05:06:06Z

01:04 @sbauguess That's true. Sometimes you spent nights with me. #
01:04 @sbauguess Only @SeanJarrard can save you now. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-06T00:04:00

2009-12-06T05:04:57Z

04:19 So, George Lopez got a show, in spite of being so unfunny that I would rather chew my own arm off than listen to him. Discuss. #
11:55 So, I just realized that if the real world were more like Marvel Comics, then Ol' Dirty bastard didn't really die, it was just his LMD. #
12:01 The ODLMD, as it were. #
12:26 I would like a world closer to Marvel comics. Politicians would be evaluated based on their domestic, international, and Galactus policies. #
13:55 You know what would be fun? Just writing "Uatu Sucks!" on a piece of paper and holding it up. And he can't do a damn thing but watch. #
14:18 I've got the Christmas lights on, it's snowing outside, and I'm about to watch "Taste the Blood of Dracula." The holidays are here. #
17:09 @KingOblivionPhD Wait, that show's still on? #
17:09 @KingOblivionPhD Surely Zach Braff's lucrative film career would have put an end to it by now. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-05T00:05:00

2009-12-05T05:05:04Z

00:36 @DrPuppykicker So this guy managed to get two movies out of McLovin'? That's one more than Christopher Mintz-Plasse. #
00:56 So, I apparently have some kind of genetic condition that prevents me from ever finishing a Zelda game. #
13:17 @EugePYDK You know what makes people feel better after a work boning? The Roots. #
13:41 @blfowler I learned that the past tense of "twit" is not actually "twat". #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-04T00:05:00

2009-12-04T05:05:56Z

01:50 Oh, Rich Johnston, you are a delight! #
01:52 Wait, no. Not a delight. What's like a delight, but the complete opposite? #
14:05 I declare today to be The Roots Day. #
20:06 @CWJacobson www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uvb_AZ8c6jI That is The Roots. #
23:11 @KingOblivionPhD Holy hell, I finished a video game before you. I agree that it was okay. Honestly, I thought X-Men Legends II was better. #
23:15 @CWJacobson I think this video will be more your speed. www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Kyw3MkVmn4&feature=player_embedded #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-03T00:04:00

2009-12-03T05:04:46Z

14:57 @EugePYDK Re: Ira Glass. My sister went to a Q&A with Mr. Glass, and apparently he has a small dog of some sort that wears a burberry cape. #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-02T00:05:00

2009-12-02T05:05:39Z

00:52 @theisb It also seems like Stephanie Meyer managed to remind you that you could have been reading Batman. #
02:07 @DrPuppykicker Jeff Dunham made more money last year than you and I put together will ever see. #
02:07 @DrPuppykicker Hope that helps. #
02:25 My new favorite quote: "This was the best episode of Heroes this season, which is a lot like making out with your hottest grandma." #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-12-01T00:05:00

2009-12-01T05:05:12Z

00:32 @talestoenrage Too late. You know how you only use 10% of your brain? Yep, Andrew WK uses the rest of it to party. #
00:47 @talestoenrage Now you understand. Quick, take this package! Get it to New York! I'll hold them off as long as I can! #
00:48 My new favorite Onion headline ever: Uncivil Liberties Group Sues for Right to Take a Crap in Public. #
12:42 Okay, what is it with young conservative guys wearing bow ties? They look stupid. #
12:42 Here is the comprehensive list of people who are allowed to wear bow ties on a day to day basis: #
12:42 1. Jimmy Olsen. #
12:43 2. Ummm..... #
12:43 2. Ol' Dirty Bastard. #
12:44 I mean, I don't think he ever wore one, but are you going to tell him no if he decides to? #
13:10 3. @polymerjones has reminded me of Brother Mouzone from The Wire. #
17:11 I am always willing to jump on bandwagons that give me a tiny chance of winning free shit. #
17:11 Win a new Macbook Pro on Cyber Monday 2009. Details here: bit.ly/29rFES #
17:48 Turns out the guy inteviewing Patton Oswalt was the kid who screamed "Oh my GOD!" in Troll 2. tinyurl.com/dflzhg #

franzferdinand2 @ 2009-11-30T00:04:00

2009-11-30T05:04:28Z

02:52 @theisb While you've had people defend Castlevania II and cousin-fucking in your comments, I think @ragnell wins now. #
02:52 @theisb She now has had people defending Rich Johnston in her comments page. #
02:53 @theisb Wait, sorry, Johnston might not see that. Let me tag it. #RichJohnstonisworsethanincest #
12:25 @wncShovelbum The new Werner Herzogism for this movie is "letting the hog loose." #
13:07 Okay, so my new thing is going to be slash fanfics for old epic poems. #
13:07 Gilgamesh/Enkidu 4 eva! #
22:10 @talestoenrage Remember that at any time, anywhere, Andrew WK might party the fuck out of you. #